How can micromanagement ruin your kids

My parents are disturbing my life in every way and I don't know how to stop it

I'm not sure how your parents "don't" let you live in your own apartment at the age of 21. You are over the required age to enter into contracts of your own accord. If you work and have a steady income, signing a lease to rent an apartment shouldn't be difficult.

That said, it sounds like your parents are against the idea, and it's entirely possible that if you choose to go against their wishes, there will be a rift in your relationship with your parents. You have to weigh these consequences yourself. Some parents would be upset for a while and then forgiven when they see responsibility demonstrated; others may deny their children and refuse to ever speak to them again or write them out of will or the like. I don't know your parents, you do. Your choice is yours, but you are the one who has to face the consequences.

Indeed, right now you can in some way deal with the consequences of your previous bad decisions. You may have lost your parents' trust. You may question your judgment, whether you are likely to make additional bad decisions, and so on. Trust is earned, not given. You may have to work to regain their confidence if this is important to you.

While it is often true that parents find it difficult to accept that their children have grown up, you may also want to ponder whether your behavior is an essential part of their perspective as a child towards an adult. One thing that pops out in your post is the title of your post. It sounds a lot like the typical teenage chorus "My parents are ruining my life", often accompanied by teenage tantrums with doors slamming, yelling at parents, or naming names that say things you don't mean, like, "I hate you, mom ". and so on.

As you get older, you will come to appreciate that, even if you disagree with your parents in all respects, your parents have years of wisdom and experience and that it sounds no matter how misguided their efforts may (or may not) be ) They are really trying to take care of your wellbeing, not harm you or destroy your life.

It sounds like they are trying to the best of their ability to express their loving concern and ensure that you are going in the right direction. I'm sure they've been around long enough to have a lot of life experience and know the saying, "Bad company corrupts good character," and they're probably trying to keep an eye out for what they consider your best View interest. You want to make sure that you are in good company and that you don't surround yourself with situations that bring you misery or financial ruin or whatever. They may be a little overly protective of this, but remember, it is not out of intent to disturb or ruin your life, but out of their desire to help you make better decisions so that you win. Don't suffer the consequences that bad decisions can lead to. You may want a lifestyle they don't approve of - but only by talking to adults can you truly understand their concerns and why they do or don't want them to do the things you want for you.

You may need to take a step back and let some of the strong emotions about the situation cool off before discussing it with your parents or making decisions that you may later regret. Reflect on your thoughts and decisions and make things clear in your head. Delete the attitude that they want to get you - if they were, they probably wouldn't have brought you home as an adult and would have been willing to support and feed you while you got back to your country instead she said, "Good luck, let us know where you are going to live, hope you find a job soon and don't end up on the street!"

You can try to understand their perspective and concerns, and how they compare to yours. You can then try to convince them that their concerns are unfounded, or that you are responsible for it and that they do not have to micromanage your friendships. Or, you can ignore their advice and concern and find your own way, for better or for worse.